Like a hall-of-fame quarterback, or a world-famous rapper, I just can't quit. I said I was retired – I thought I was retired! – but I couldn't stay away. My sabbatical only made my skills sharper, sexier, more intoxicating. Though I'm at the top of this orgasm-ruining game, I still have skeptics out there – guess I got something to prove. To make my point, I don't let up, not after he pops, not after he cries, not after a pathetic second drip-out.